wilder daze

We recently spoke with Wilder Daze, a gay recording artist based in Brooklyn. We fell in love with his single and the travel-themed video.

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1) Tell us about Brooklyn. What’s it like to live there as an artist?

I’ve lived in Brooklyn for almost a year now. I’ve been in NYC for almost six, but I came to Brooklyn to be closer to my recording studio. It’s very convenient for me as an artist because I can walk over to my studio. I also love going to my favorite little Parisian cafe up the street to do some work or read. I mostly love this area because it still has that old-school charm, and there’s just a lot of great bars, cafes, thrift shops. I love walking around here at night. It’s quieter than Manhattan, but I find Brooklyn to be full of just as many surprises.

2) What are some of your most memorable trips? How often do you travel and what kinds of places do you travel to?

Well, I’m half Brazilian, so growing up; I traveled to Brazil a lot. Those are some of my most memorable trips. We would visit my mom’s family in Belo Horizonte, where I’d see all my cousins, and then explore other cities. Rio is by far my favorite. I love to go there now as an adult, when I can. I love any city where people are drinking and dancing in the street, and it’s just a part of the culture there.

I travel every year, some more than others. I’m always excited to go somewhere new. Last year, I traveled to Europe for the first time. I went to Prague, Dubrovnik, Paris, and Amsterdam. It was truly the experience of a lifetime. Every city was gorgeous. Paris in particular was one that I had a love affair with. The beauty of the city and the people are what made me blush. I also ended my year in New Orleans, which has become my favorite city in the US, besides New York. It’s wild. I heard the best music of my life in that city.

3) What are your reasons for traveling?

Growing up, I traveled mostly to either visit family or spend time with family. Now, I’d say I travel the most just to experience a new city or country, and I love doing that with good friends. Traveling is very inspiring for my writing as well. I find that I do most of my writing when I’m going somewhere.

4) In your latest video, you tell the story of a holiday romance in Paris – tell us a bit more about that…

Some of the most profound romances that I’ve had have also been the most brief. In Paris, I truly felt that a passion inside of me had been reignited. It was one of those life-changing, unforgettable moments. It wasn’t just one person but also the architecture, the aesthetic of the city, the food, the wine. I spent my 23rd birthday there and drank a bottle of wine underneath the Eiffel Tower with my sister and our friends. My romance in Paris was short-lived though. I felt like I was being snatched away too soon, and I hope to go back this year to pick up where we left off.

5) Have any other holiday romance stories you want to share? 😉

I did have one other holiday romance. It was at the start of 2015 in Rio de Janeiro. It lasted a couple days, so actually longer than in Paris. We smoked and watched the sunset. All I’ll say is that it was the best I’ve ever had, for other reasons. It’s another one that I still think about all the time. I tend to hold on to my romances for dear life, long or short.

“Blush” is the first single off his upcoming debut album, “Golden Hour.” His latest production was shot on VHS video to complement the retro pop vibe on the track. The video tells the story of a short-lived romance in Paris. Learn more about his music on his website, www.wilderdaze.com

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Equality pictures by Daniel Mora

Euality pictures by Daniel Mora

Euality pictures by Daniel Mora

Berlin is a city that where you hear thousands of stories a day. Some of them are so interesting that you can’t stop listening to them. Meeting this story tellers keeps you informed and aware that some of us still care about the community. I got the chance to meet Daniel Mora, an expath from the US living in Berlin. He’s a supporter of the LGBT community and has something to tell us…
Daniel, please tell us when you decided to start supporting the LGBT community.
My project on equal rights came about during the 2012 USA presidential election. There was so much hate speech from the conservatives regarding all aspects of their political positions and I was frustrated hearing their rhetoric all the time. Specifically the issue of preventing marriage rights for all people in the US due to their sexual preferences and identities. In the USA, the right of marriage also has legal benefits such as tax incentives, adoption opportunities, and visitation rights for ill and injured spouses.
The emotion of love is an equally similar experience across all peoples of the earth. And to say that a couple in love is not allowed to be married because it would violate the “sanctity of marriage” was maddening. Especially considering that the divorce rate in the USA is now over 60% across the country.
I wanted to meet a diverse group of couples who were in love and attempt to capture their emotion and love toward one and other. I felt this would be a very complex project because real intimate love is a tremendously private experience and being able to visually express it with a stranger watching and snapping photos is not a comfortable experience. I put an advertisement on craigslist looking for volunteers and also asked my friends to see if they knew anyone who would be interested in participating. Thankfully I had a number of volunteers from all ages, races, and persuasions.
Being able to witness people express their love towards one and other, as well as share their stories with me was very emotionally fulfilling. Especially for me when in my own personal life I have not had the opportunity to experience love of this depth.
I wish to continue working for equal rights and showing that humans are all the same no matter where we come from, how we look, and who we love. I hope that being able to share these stories and emotions with others through photography can encourage people to speak up about these issues, and also hopefully change opinions of those who disagree with these sentiments.
To see more of Daniel’s photography work, click HERE

 

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Some gays and lesbians denied the fact that they had some measure of hatred to each other while some admit that truly their relationship with their fellow lesbian or gay doesn’t go smoothly. One of the lesbians whose name will not be disclose remarked that “they started [the gay], we were gonna fight and we are gonna end it”. This statement shows that even they themselves are aware of hatred or dislike that existed between the two groups.

While this might not be applicable to all gay – lesbian relationship, this may be the reason why many denied the fact that there is no such experience or hatred that existed between them, it is a matter of personal orientation about individual’s sexual identity.

There are some gay men that have had an awesome relationship with lesbians because they choose to not be resentful, and there are some gays that actually don’t get along well with lesbians. Wherever they spot a lesbian or group of lesbians, the hatred just pop into their mind, vis – à –vis the lesbians to the gays also.

The question is why are there this kind of reactions to each homosexual group?

Opinions are many on what could have caused the arousal of such kind of reaction from both groups and it becomes very difficult to ascertain that this is the exact reasons that brought about this reaction. However, one of the major reasons why such kind of reaction is being exude by both the gays and the lesbians is pride. It actually comes from the gay side.

This is due to the wrong perception among the gays that the lesbians see themselves as a man. Since gay and lesbian relationship is just like the heterosexual relationship that involves two partner – one male and the other female – just that in the former both are of the same sex, the gays thought since two female are required to complete a lesbian relationship that those females now pictured themselves as men; i.e. equating themselves to men.

While the gays do not have any strife or discord with lesbians that uses lipstick – they look more feminine to the gays – they extremely detest those lesbians who tends to act or dress like a man. The pride that the lesbian doesn’t have what it takes to keep the ins and outs of the relationship at its best does make the gay men not to associate with the lesbians.

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If you’re reading this blog, you’re no doubt familiar with the initalism LGBT (Lesbian, Gay, Bisexual and Transsexual or Transgender) that’s used to refer to a large proportion of the non-heterosexual and/or non-cisgender population.

This is really just the tip of the iceberg, as the initialism can be further extended to LGBTQIA, where the Q is for queer or questioning, I for intersex and A for asexual or ally. It is in fact also possible to extend it even more to LGBTTQQIAAP, or other fun pronounceable variants like QUILTBAG and FABGLITTER.

But what do these labels serve to do for us as a community? Does having so many different labels that enable self-actualisation and ownership under the same umbrella unite us in our diversity, or do they assist segregation within the community, thereby pushing us apart? How, in fact, did we end up together in the same camp in the first place?

Certainly this comes down in large part to history.

The gay liberation movement in New York that grew out of the Stonewall riots of 1969, for example, was mostly organised by gay men, and subsequently received support from gay women in solidarity to their cause.

By extension, others who identified as non-heterosexual were drawn in to taking part and so the community grew and so the umbrella expanded to include more and more different kinds of identities and orientations.

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Of course, I see this is a wonderful thing. I am moved by such inclusivity, and am deeply proud to be part of such a community.

But nowadays we have pride events and awareness initiatives aimed at specific segments of the LGBTQIA community as they become more and more independent from one another. We have bisexual awareness week once a year, and several cities in North America (Toronto, Seattle, San Francisco, DC and now Brighton in the UK) have trans pride events separate from the main pride events.

As we are gaining autonomy from each other, does the LGBTQIA community still really exist?

In one way, the fact that it may no longer be necessary is a great sign of the progress towards equality (and indeed the perceived ‘normalness’ of such identities as gay, trans or genderqueer) in several societies around the world.

Nonetheless, there is still a lot of work to do, and I believe that solidarity with any (historically or currently) oppressed minority can go a long way to progress the cause of equality.

So even though it might potentially bother a particularly touchy leather dyke in a committed dom-sub triad with her two slaves somewhere to be mentioned in the same breath as a squealing power bottom drag queen who likes hooking up with bears on Grindr, our solidarity for each others equality is ultimately more important.

Maybe we should just expand our initialism to include all the letters of the alphabet and embrace them with equal love and compassion.

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Grow a beard

Have you ever wondered what it is like having a beard? Do people will perceive you in a different way?- Those were things I asked myself during the last few weeks. An answer to these questions would only be possible by experimenting. That’s why no razor will be seen at my place for the next weeks.

Being labeled as a  ‘twink’ wasn’t bothering me at all, I enjoyed myself and took advantage of it. The number of guys asking to get twinks is just ridiculous, there seem to be people focused/obssesed with it. It doesn’t mean the opposite with beards, speacially in Berlin, which I like calling ” The City of all beards” – Hipsters with all types of beards, leather guys with beards (obviously), and of course the regular population wishing to have the genes to get one.

By having said that, I don’t mean to offend anyone. Just to clarify that having a beard doesn’t make you more of a men. Unfortunately gay society stigmatizes each one of us, and doesn’t really offer as much freedom as it declares. This feeling made me want to see how it feels like being on other side of the river, meaning: Growing a Beard.

At the beginnning I didn’t really think this would change a lot the public I usually attract. To my surprise, it did. On the train I would get more eye-contact with guys that were normally out of my league. It has to do with the fact most guys here have a beardm sounds like a cliché, but that’s how it is. 5 days have gone by, growing a beard sounds like a plan to me! One that will probably take about 3 weeks to happen…

Not worrying about shaving is nice, it saves also 10 minutes of your day. Doesn’t make you much more of a men but it will make you look much more masculine ( exception: very querky bearded guys ) –  Guys seem to be into it, so let’s go for it. A follow-up story will be posted in about 2 weeks, just to let you know further results of it.

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Podcasts are a great way to pass long journeys, whether you’re on a train, bus, boat or plane, especially if you get easily motion sick and don’t want to read a book. You also have the added advantage of being able to watch the scenery go by as you listen. And what’s more, they’re free!

There are so many podcasts out there, it can be hard to know where to start if you’re new to the medium, so here are my top picks for gay, gay-friendly and gay-adjacent podcasts.

The Savage Lovecast

Dan Savage, a gay author, journalist and LGBTQ activist, hosts this weekly (pre-recorded) sex and relationship advice show, where anyone can call in with problems and he dispenses sane, helpful, often witty, occasionally heart-felt advice.

He also starts the show with a rant on a recent issue that can or could affect anyone from the LGBT community, women, parents or liberals, and his opinions are some of the most balanced, well-argued out there. As a bonus, he sometimes talks about his monogamish relationship with his hot husband, Terry Miller.

Out in the Vineyard Radio

Mark Vogler and Gary Saperstein present this weekly show from Sonoma County, California and cover what’s going on in wine country and wine-related events, LGBT news from around the US and the world, celebrity gossip, sometimes with guests. If you’re a wine lover, this one is definitely for you!

Throwing Shade

Hosted by Erin Gibson and Bryan Safi, this comedy podcast takes a “weekly look at all the issues important to ladies and gays and treat them with much less respect than they deserve”. This the kind of podcast I can’t listen to in public without breaking out in to seemingly unprovoked laughter.

Erin and Bryan riff off each other perfectly, making for a hilarious and tangential commentary on current events and news stories. While it’s mostly a giggle fest, they also present well thought out and intelligent arguments on relevant topics and occasionally have guests.

Gay Ambitions

Paul Collanton, a Denverite working in marketing, brings us interesting and insightful interviews with entrepreneurs and business people from the LGBT community on his bimonthly podcast. On his associated blog, he also recommends apps useful to the aspiring entrepreneur, publishes inspirational quotes and recaps interesting articles relating to LGBT and business issues.

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I keep screaming inside: why are they letting us die? Why is no one helping us? And here’s the truth, here’s the answer: they just don’t like us.

Tommy Boatwright in The Normal Heart (portrayed by Jim Parsons)

Given my age, that I didn’t come into the gay scene properly until around 2004 and that I didn’t know any older gay guys growing up I had very little idea of the horror, injustice and grief that so many gay men had witnessed or had gone through during the AIDS crisis of the 1980s and 1990s.

Watching The Normal Heart, a 2014 production from HBO based on a play of the same name by Larry Kramer, was my first real unflinching exposure to this extremely unfortunate and tragic part of our recent history.

Though fictionalised in several respects (most of the characters are all based on real people but have different names and sets of circumstances), the film portrays the time in the early 1980s when the AIDS crisis was first rearing its ugly head in the United States, and in New York City in particular, which apparently had the most recorded cases of anywhere in the world at the time.

The focus of The Normal Heart is really on the characters, and how the crisis affects them and the ones they love, but the scope is also broader, demonstrating how the US government ignored the problem for many years: just before the end credits, we are reminded that President Reagen didn’t even use the word AIDS publicly until 1986, a full six years after the first patient was documented in the USA. (Source.)

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I found the performances in the film from big names such as Mark Ruffalo (Ned Weeks), Julia Roberts (Dr. Emma Brookner) and Matt Bomer (Felix Turner) to be convincing, moving and nuanced, and they all did a wonderful job of portraying the three main characters.

The supporting cast (Taylor Kitsch, Jim Parsons, Jim Mantello) also provide several poignant moments where dialogue, delivery and body language all came together to move me to the edge of tears.

This is not a film to be watched for a fun night in with friends or lovers, but I feel it is an important watch, especially if, like me, you are not so knowledgable about this small but impactful part of our history.

While I wouldn’t necessarily describe it as enjoyable, it is well made, the story progresses steadily without feeling dragged out and it evokes a range of emotions, at least in this viewer.

GAY TOURISTS DISCRIMINATION

The more you travel, the more you get to live new experiences. Some of them can be taken as good and some others… Well, you would prefer not to repeat them. Depending where you’re traveling the attitude towards gay tourists is different, some countries allow you to be openly gay, others just take you to jail and treat you as a criminal for expressing the way you are.

Some of the problems gay tourists experience while begin abroad change from time to time, some of them include: Rudeness from locals, public discrimination, and worse case scenario physical violence. This happens to many tourists in all possible cases, and all possible places. As an example I’d like to tell you my experience in a Hostel in Amsterdam where one of the people that were sleeping in my room refused to stay the night at the hostel because he wasn’t going to spend the night in the same room where a gay was sleeping! Stupid, isn’t it?

As this could happen anywhere in this world, the only I can tell you is to say NO to homophobia. We all deserve respect and the fact that we are gay shouldn’t be a problem for us to be in any country, tell this people who commit these acts of discrimination to stop and shut up, that would be the only way people is finally going to learn that sleeping with another guy in the same room won’t make them gay(some of this people already are).

In case something bigger happens or you just want to report this type of cases, there’s countries like the Netherlands where the Pink Police will be glad to help you anytime!

 

 

twinky boy

Summer is almost over in Berlin, hopefully the very low temperatures won’t hit us very soon! It also seems that I have to start changing the things I am wearing in order not to catch a cold. In the mean time I will just pretend we still have temperatures between and 20 and 30 degrees, plus the feeling of being on the beach with all my friends, that will keep me warm for  a couple of days.

It’s 5:30 pm and I have to go out in half an hour, gotta take shower and get ready… I ask myself what should I wear, see all my shorts and realize they are ‘too’ short, then I  remember all the things that are related to short-shorts and how easily your image can be missled while wearing something or having a certain type of face. Some people have called me a twink and said I wear outfits for twinky guys, and also said that look I pretty much like one. The common idea of a ‘twink’ is pretty much  an attractive, boyish, young and slender hairless gay man.

There is nothing wrong about being a ‘twinky boy’ or a ‘bear’ or any other type of person, but we should think that all this labels that have been created for us, made us look like being in a supermarket where you can choose by colour, size and type of guy. About a month ago I decided to shorten my hair as much as possible, thought the result would be people not seeing me anymore as the ‘ very-cute-twink ‘ they saw before… And it did work, now that I have my short hair I feel very comfortable about the heat and the image I project and  feel satisfied about it, I can still wear short-shorts without falling into the same label and things seems to have changed a bit.

Sadly,  twink-alikes are given the ultimatum between becoming one of the group or simply pray for someone who wants you and doesn’t feel like rejecting every boy whose body doesn’t fit the regular standards set for very young guys…

http://www.thedandyproject.com

Do men wear makeup?

The question itself would have been ridiculous around 10 years ago, now many guys wear make up, I am not talking only about the cliché of homosexuals wearing make up, No! I am talking about regular guys, people who simply want to hide a pimple or make their eye bags look smaller. From the guy who is the Metrosexual until the very straight guy who just want to look his best on a date with his future girlfriend, they all want to look more appropiate and fit within the new ‘standards’ of beauty.

I remember my friends in Catholic school making fun of me just for saying to one of them that I use foundation to cover some pimples I had ( thank God they disappeared ), then realising some years after that they had pretty much done the same thing I did… Nowadays, I don’t wear any makeup, just because my skin turned out to be good and I follow a healthy diet, but if I had to, I would wear some foundation to hide pimples.

One thing I could also say about this ‘guy makeup thing’ is, no matter the gender, you can do pretty much whatever you want to your body, it’s your choice to look however you want to look, to follow this trend or the other to wear black, yellow or pink. Don’t let society to decide everything you have to do, and please do not let Fashion to tell you how you have to look like.

It is proven that men value appearance in their partner much more than vice versa, this does not mean he can forget about his appearance, still the judgement to these type of men is present. My point is (again) that we can all put as much makeup as we want, judgement is something overrated and there’s enough ‘normal’ people out there to even care about it.